Well, its coming to an end, my course! We only have two more weekends before we are heading out into the world with sweet innocent fresh yoga teacher eyes. I’m excited and have already started sussing out teaching opportunities (oh, how much fun it will be!).
I feel ready to teach personally. I’ve been teaching small, often impromptu, kundalini classes for the last year to great success. My confidence has grown throughout the course because I feel like I am so well informed. I also trust myself. I trust that my teachers know what they are doing. I trust that when I’m in a class I will have the right information ingrained into me.
I also see that this is going to be an ongoing training for me. Great, I’ve completed this first level. But I want to go deeper. And deeper. And deeper.
I don’t want to go deeper into Sikhism, nor do I want to go deeper into cult-like kundalini yoga. Kundalini yoga has been a huge tool of inner exploration and healing for myself, and that’s where I want to go deeper. I already have a list of courses I’d like to take to enhance my practice and what I can gift to my students.
Despite all of this confidence I am nervous for Practicums! See, I have myself, and I know who I am fairly well. I am nervous for Practicums because I have to dress like a “teacher”! Strange I know. And the whole grading part. I can’t recall if I wrote about this, but for the first few months of the course, I had this huge fear that I wouldn’t graduate for some strange reason.
I almost didn’t graduate though.
In the midst of a series of melt downs in February brought on by Sodarshan Kriya I believe and the stress of not having a consistent home now for 8 months I almost just took off to Hawaii leaving the course incomplete.
But that’s a pattern for me.
I used to live with the idea that opportunities only come once, but I’ve learned that opportunities that are right for you will wait for you to be ready for it. I’ve learned that I don’t have to run away from my internal challenges. They will follow me anyways.
So will the opportunities.
I am sticking it out here, and man, am I ever glad that I am. I don’t know why. But I can see so many opportunities here if I stay here long-term, making Vancouver my base, before I head out elsewhere. I do not see myself raising children here and I do see myself raising children in the future. For now though, for my business, my creativity, my yoga practice, this is the mecca for me to learn, incorporate and connect with others.
On that note, this post was supposed to be an invitation to you lovely local Vancouver readers!
On April 25th to April 28th at Yoga West there is a Yoga-Thon where all the new teachers graduating from this years course, like myself, will be teaching! You should come by and check it out. Classes are only $5 and an hour long. I’ll keep you updated as to which day and time I’m teaching. 🙂